kotm wrote: ↑05 Sep 2023, 07:14
...There is a ton of anger related to instances of being mistreated. Mistreated by fellow members growing up, and even Youth leaders. I know exactly who it was, their names, their faces and exactly what they did to me. What really pisses me off most is seeing those who treated me so poorly are basically winning at life. Meanwhile, everyday is a struggle thanks to the trauma these people have caused me. Feels like there's no justice and they'll never have to face the consequences for their actions. I have severe anxiety, can't seem to make friends, can't seem to date. (lds girls just aren't interested in me). All thanks to these people. There's a wedge, a mental block there that's preventing me from moving forward. From socializing within the church, etc. I always look around and see people dating, and often wonder wtf is wrong with me. Often times I really feel like I wasn't even meant to be.
For me personally, anger is a big problem when I carry it to the extreme. There are a number of things I do to control my anger:
1. I have a number of very close friends that I can talk to & confide with. I respect their opinions & insight into issues. They in turn, confide in me.
2. I do my best to not carry anger over to it being resentment.
3. I avoid anyone who "pisses" me off, as you describe.
4. I try to get physical exercise.
5. I have outside organizations & activities from church.
6. If church is a major part of my anger, I find something else to do. And, I did for about 8 years. (I don't feel guilty because of my decision.)
7. We are back to full activity, but I keep my distance. That includes:
-- No leadership positions.
-- No talks or lessons unless I can make a full commitment to it.
-- I don't argue with anyone. I sit quietly or I walk out outside & help a friend who provides a food give a way in the church parking lot.
-- I keep my distance. My calling is Family History. (No body asks questions or asks for help. I do like to do the research. (I found my place.)
Your list may differ. I only put mine up there to show you that you do have options.