Sorry about being unclear, I don't have any desire to be out of my current calling as Ward Clerk. I just feel as if my heart is not in it however I can perform my duties I need to. The next calling, whatever it may be is what I am concerned about because I feel more like stepping back than progressing. Also, my input at bishopric meetings use to be valued but is now dismissed more often than not. I was asked to give a talk on tithing about a year ago and I turned it down and haven't been approached since. I think they sense my lack of commitment but don't care why. There is a reason why and I am going to be honest about it. Come what may.SilentDawning wrote: ↑15 Jun 2019, 06:35I don't feel that I fully understand the issues clearly in this case. You would like out of your calling, but there are also issues with past mistakes, career development, and supporting your family. You would like to talk to local leaders, but we all know that is a dead end, potentially harmful to your situation, and not advised....but I am not sure how it all ties together....if you care to explain it more clearly, that might help with giving an informed opinion.
I am not having gospel issues and church history is something I can suppress without frustration at least for now. What I can't deal with is what I am going through in my personal life, the results of being compelled as a newly activated member all those years ago to serve in a calling that knocked me right out of my pursuit to better myself, finish my degree, fulfill a life long dream in aviation, used up ten's of thousands of dollars on the way and more but I realize I am getting a little hot inside and spouting more than I really need to. I don't trust anyone who doesn't want to be honest with me and I internally question everything any leader preaches about. It isn't getting any better by just keeping everything in my head.
Some of the details can be found here.