What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

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LCWalker
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What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by LCWalker »

I'm curious because I had even family seem to draw their own conclusions which happened to be the wrong ones. But what do you think the top or main reasons are?

NOTE: this isn't a right or wrong answer question. I am simply curious as to what people think
Last edited by LCWalker on 04 Feb 2022, 09:02, edited 1 time in total.
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nibbler
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by nibbler »

LCWalker wrote: 31 Jan 2022, 17:07 ...draw their own conclusions which happened to be the wrong ones...
This portion of the discussion borders on being against the rules of forum etiquette.

Rules of Etiquette
The List of Don'ts
Please do not start discussions that lead to a debate with the results of finding the one correct answer to a problem. Topics like this will probably be moderated.
Personally, I feel there are no wrong reasons for someone to leave the church. It's their life, it's their decision. Invalidating others and denying their experience is a form of abuse.

To answer the question... this sounds general or dismissive but it's my answer. I think the main reason people leave the church is that the church is no longer working for them. The cons have outweighed the pros. What constitutes working, what constitutes a pro, and what constitutes a con will vary from person to person.
I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Tired from the move. Day 2: Everyone thinks I'm an idiot.
— Steven Wright
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DarkJedi
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by DarkJedi »

I think the study/book The Next Mormons took a fairly close look at this and Jana Riess has commented fairly extensively on the topic. There seems to be no one reason and reasons do vary somewhat by generation. The overall top reasons were
1. No longer being able to reconcile personal values and priorities with those of the Church
2. Stopped believing there was one true Church
3. Not trusting the Church’s leadership to tell the truth surrounding controversial or historical issues
Among Millennials (the focus of the study) the top reasons were:
1. Feeling judged or misunderstood
2. Not trusting the Church’s leadership to tell the truth surrounding controversial or historical issues
3. The Church’s position on LGBT issues
Quoting Dieter Uchtdorf (Oct. 2013):
One might ask, “If the gospel is so wonderful, why would anyone leave?” Sometimes we assume it is because they have been offended or lazy or sinful. Actually, it is not that simple. In fact, there is not just one reason that applies to the variety of situations.
I do believe in Riess's study and the results, I buy into all the reasons stated in the above top 3 reasons (and there are more in the study). I also believe DFU - there is no one reason, and it's none of the three he mentioned. And I agree with Nibbler - there are no wrong reasons.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

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AmyJ
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by AmyJ »

CONNECTED CAVEAT:
If a person manages to end up in a faith transition where the belief in God is diminished, that situation is likely a deciding factor for a person leaving churches in general - including the LDS church.

Other factors:
History and Trust Narrative - sets the foundation for church culture and teachings. History post-internet is murky because the internet brings up various narrative-jarring instances that collectively can lead to the individual mistrusting the teachings they were taught about the church by the church.

Culture/Community - this is actually closely tied to history to define the rules and expectations of the individuals against those of the organization and community. I know that the church leaders teach there is the "individual" and there is the "church" - but in reality, there are 3 parties involved; the "individual", the "community" (usually ward/branch leadership and fellowship) and the "church" (the administration side of things in Utah).
NOTE: Correlation has weakened community ties throughout different programs. My experience in America has been that these community efforts have been shifted into different groups: recreation activities run by the city, meals on wheels run by a non-profit, and social services training/guidance in Utah that was practiced in that 1920's has shifted into paid positions run by local groups starting in the 1950's or so.

Value Systems - if a person walks away from the church, it is because there comes a point where the main values the individual espouses are not in line with the values being practiced by the "church" or the "community" or the value priority is a gapping mismatch.

Final Thought:
A person can leave easier now then previously. It is easier to move and still be connected to family members. More diverse values are being talked about and people are organizing about. Information is freely available to analyze and utilize.
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PazamaManX
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by PazamaManX »

nibbler wrote: 31 Jan 2022, 17:38
To answer the question... this sounds general or dismissive but it's my answer. I think the main reason people leave the church is that the church is no longer working for them. The cons have outweighed the pros. What constitutes working, what constitutes a pro, and what constitutes a con will vary from person to person.
If there was an answer that was "right", I would say this would be it. The reasons for why someone leaves are going to be all over the place. When boiled down though, every reason comes down to the negatives outweighing the positives.
"Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call to her tribunal every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness, even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear." ~ Thomas Jefferson
Roy
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by Roy »

nibbler wrote: 31 Jan 2022, 17:38 I think the main reason people leave the church is that the church is no longer working for them. The cons have outweighed the pros. What constitutes working, what constitutes a pro, and what constitutes a con will vary from person to person.
Yes, I suppose there can be multiple ways to answer this question. I think that the reason that most (as in the largest number by percentage) people go inactive is that the church experience is not relevant enough to the lives of these individuals. I'm picturing young people that stop going once they move out of their parents' home or go off to college. I'm thinking new converts that stop attending within a few months of their baptism. etc. etc.

I sometimes say that the church offers 19th century solutions in a 21st century environment. IOW, the church seems to be structured in such a way as to answer the question of "Which church is the true church?" and the entire premise of that question just does not seem to be a burning or relevant issue anymore. I also say that the church model is very duty oriented. IOW, we do lots of things that we would probably not want to do but we do them anyway out of duty and obligation and sacrifice. We balance that duty with our way being the only "true" way. For those that are less interested/engaged with the "one true church" concept then the church experience can feel onerous.

I feel that most of the people that leave in this way do not come to internet boards like this one to discuss their reasons for leaving/going inactive. They just move on.
"It is not so much the pain and suffering of life which crushes the individual as it is its meaninglessness and hopelessness." C. A. Elwood

“It is not the function of religion to answer all the questions about God’s moral government of the universe, but to give one courage, through faith, to go on in the face of questions he never finds the answer to in his present status.” TPC: Harold B. Lee 223

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SilentDawning
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by SilentDawning »

On the home page of staylds.com, the bottom left panel provides a list of reasons people leave the LDS. John Dehlin did it with a rather huge sample size with apparently decent research. Sadly, he didn't appear to calculate the percent of respondents who picked which reason. Perhaps that is found somewhere else.

I don't know the main reasons people leave. I know my reason(s) for lackluster, using John Dehlin's categories are mainly due church experiences with members and leadership. After that crept in, then historical and policy reasons started getting to me.
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

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Old-Timer
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by Old-Timer »

It is what it is.

I don't mean that flippantly. It is my comprehensive answer. We have voluminous responses to the question, in one way or another, in our archived posts.

The same is true of why people stay.

Also, just for transparency, as has been said already, this post is on a fine line. No problem as long as the rule is not broken; problem if that happens.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken
Minyan Man
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by Minyan Man »

Below is a link to a Youtube presentation by John Dehlin.
I found it interesting how he addressed this topic.
His presentation is titled:
Top 5 Myths and Truths about why Committed Mormons Leave the Church
If anyone thinks it is inappropriate or a duplicate in another post, please delete.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EP3GJeYIN3s

The material maybe a little old or dated. Be prepared, it is almost an hour long.
I like the way John discusses this topic. He is very thoughtful & a very good teacher.
LCWalker
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Re: What Do You Think are the main reasons people leave the LDS church?

Post by LCWalker »

Thank you all very much for your answers. I noticed that nobody mentioned doctrine. It's interesting but then, where doctrine used to be a driving force in so many world religions those distinctions that come from doctrine seem to be getting blurred these days, so maybe its not part of the matrix.

Again, thank you all!
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