New Ward

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
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Re: New Ward

Post by Old-Timer » 25 Mar 2017, 11:43

I hope it goes well. It seems like a much better situation.

Also, there are exceptions to every rule. I have zero problem with having clear ward boundaries, as a general rule, but exceptions need to be honored. This obviously is an exception.
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Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

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Re: New Ward

Post by mom3 » 25 Mar 2017, 15:22

AP - there is no shame in wanting to be cared for, respected, or treated with courtesy. Wanting that does not make you an Eeyore.

I have a son on the spectrum. Also high functioning. Like you DH and I served willingly, generously, and sincerely. As adults it served us well. For the kids, it didn't matter. I don't believe my kids experience was quite what yours was, but some of it is so close. My oldest daughter is active but is just fine if we skip church when we are here. Or if we just go to Sacrament Meeting and then exit at the Amen. But in other wards she has been happy.

My other 2 kids are fully inactive. The son on the spectrum nearly mirrors your daughter's experience. His only upside was another boy was also "unique" everyone just lumped them together. The final straw came when my son and husband were at a Scout Camping Trip, and one of the leaders said to my husband (my husband was a die hard scout - then scout master) "I can't believe I got called over the troop with the handicapped kids." Son nor spouse left immediately, but the final wheels were coming off the bus by then. Now neither of them attend. My son directly because of it. DH because of the standard faith crisis issues. The scout thing he could have fixed. But by the time the church looks so different it doesn't matter - it didn't matter. My son connected with a theater group, made some sincere friendships and hasn't looked back since.

What your feeling is genuine Mama Bear. Own it. Nothing wrong with you.
"I stayed because it was God and Jesus Christ that I wanted to follow and be like, not individual human beings." Chieko Okazaki Dialogue interview

"I am coming to envision a new persona for the Church as humble followers of Jesus Christ....Joseph and his early followers came forth with lots of triumphalist rhetoric, but I think we need a new voice, one of humility, friendship and service. We should teach people to believe in God because it will soften their hearts and make them more willing to serve." - Richard Bushman

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Re: New Ward

Post by Donna » 25 Mar 2017, 17:11

I am glad that they are letting you got to another ward and moved your records. I hope it goes well for you and your family.

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Re: New Ward

Post by SamBee » 26 Mar 2017, 15:00

Going to another ward is perhaps a good thing. It is better for you than the church - I doubt you're that much of a problem (we had a genuine problem here but said problem is now a jailbird and rightly so. I doubt you guys are in that order of magnitude.)

It reminds me of when I was at school. I dropped a year. Best thing I ever did there. My grades improved and I also got in with a nicer bunch of people... don't know what it was but the class I used to be in was full of bullies... strange how one class can be like that and another, another way.
DASH1730 "An Area Authority...[was] asked...who...would go to the Telestial kingdom. His answer: "murderers, adulterers and a lot of surprised Mormons!"'
1ST PRES 1978 "[LDS] believe...there is truth in many religions and philosophies...good and great religious leaders... have raised the spiritual, moral, and ethical awareness of their people. When we speak of The [LDS] as the only true is...authorized to administer the Jesus Christ... we do not mean... it is the only teacher of truth."

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Re: New Ward

Post by SilentDawning » 28 Mar 2017, 12:44

AP == try to be positive about it. Forget the old ward. My daughter had her share of bullying. Don't pick at that scab. Hopefully the new Ward will be nice to you. Give it a chance for your daughter's sake and the Pollyanaisms. We moved our daughter to a new Ward and it was the greatest thing.

As much as I have a love-hate relationship with the church, it's good to see her engaged with the church as a TBM, happy, surrounded by good people at BYU, looking forward to a structured life, an absence of unorthodoxy or faith crisis. It makes me happy for her. Hopefully you can feel the same happiness for your daughter if she can get into a good ward.

Sounds like a mean, arrogant Ward, your last one. I saw a lot of them in California when I served there as a missionary. Money tends to breed contempt in some people. Sounds like that old ward had its share.
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

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