What if he doesn't release me?

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
Donna
Posts: 82
Joined: 24 Nov 2011, 20:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Donna » 18 Jan 2017, 18:30

Reuben,

The Stake President knows what is going on. Sadly, it has happened to several other people.

Donna
Posts: 82
Joined: 24 Nov 2011, 20:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Donna » 28 Jan 2017, 10:19

Great News, I finally got released.

User avatar
Reuben
Posts: 466
Joined: 05 Nov 2016, 10:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Reuben » 29 Jan 2017, 04:49

That really is great news! Any idea how it happened? Is there still a threat of retaliation?
My intro

Love before dogma. Truth before loyalty. Knowledge before certainty.

User avatar
nibbler
Posts: 4580
Joined: 14 Nov 2013, 07:34
Location: Ten miles west of the exact centre of the universe

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by nibbler » 29 Jan 2017, 06:43

That's good to hear.
Cure sometimes, treat often, comfort always.
— Hippocrates

Donna
Posts: 82
Joined: 24 Nov 2011, 20:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Donna » 30 Jan 2017, 10:45

I am very happy to be released. There is still a big problem with the Bishop. He will not let me have another calling. No one told me I was being released. I looked it up on the church web site.

Minyan Man
Posts: 2015
Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 13:40

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Minyan Man » 30 Jan 2017, 11:01

Donna wrote:I am very happy to be released. There is still a big problem with the Bishop. He will not let me have another calling. No one told me I was being released. I looked it up on the church web site.
Situations like yours makes me very angry. Donna, you are far more patient than I would be. For what it's worth,
Thank you for your service.
I really mean it. The church needs more people like you. Especially in the Bishopric.

If & when you get a new calling, do you have to look on the church web site? (That just frosts my cookies.) Absolutely terrible.

Donna
Posts: 82
Joined: 24 Nov 2011, 20:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Donna » 30 Jan 2017, 21:21

Thank you, everyone.

I don't think I will be getting a new calling for a very long time if ever.
I really have had enough. Sadly, the situation is not likely to change. I planned to help a friend with some volunteer activities locally.

User avatar
Reuben
Posts: 466
Joined: 05 Nov 2016, 10:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Reuben » 31 Jan 2017, 04:23

Minyan Man wrote:For what it's worth,
Thank you for your service.
I really mean it. The church needs more people like you. Especially in the Bishopric.
:clap: :clap: :clap:
My intro

Love before dogma. Truth before loyalty. Knowledge before certainty.

Donna
Posts: 82
Joined: 24 Nov 2011, 20:04

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by Donna » 31 Jan 2017, 06:58

Thank you for your kind words.

User avatar
SilentDawning
Posts: 7348
Joined: 09 May 2010, 19:55

Re: What if he doesn't release me?

Post by SilentDawning » 31 Jan 2017, 08:17

Donna wrote:Silent Dawning
The Bishop is pretty upset with me for asking to be release. He told me I can't have another calling for a year. I am pretty such that is not in the church hand book.
Oh Pleeeeaasee....you can't have a calling for a year now? Great, now THAT'S the way to engender commitment from the members to their callings! Sign me up for another calling! I can't wait for all the trepidation that happens if I get sick, or have personal issues that make me ask for a release (particularly if I don't want to share the reasons). What a great feeling, to know that I have personal issues, and when I ask for a release, I get a slap on the wrist as part of my solution to my problems (the release).

And oh goody -- as a leader, I'll get people halfheartedly serving in their callings out of a) fear of punishment and b) duty because they can't be open about their true feelings.

What does he do if you refuse a calling that is offered to you? Is there are warning issued? Refuse a second calling, and get written up? And then, the third time, suspended from all callings for a year??? With annotation on your "employment record" [since they don't seem to get this is all voluntary! If I were you, I'd go back and ask if there is vacation pay since you are no longer a volunteer.

And to boot, the SP knows the BP is doing this, and apparently, is doing nothing? THAT has never happened before.

I hope I'm not being over the top in this bit of sarcasm. I had to get it out.

This Bishop needs to do a few things in my view:

a) Reduce his expectations for what his ward can achieve given its various constraints on people. Find ways of asserting himself with the Stake to put their expectations in line with his. This punitive policy, if given solely due to your asking for a release, is likely evidence of his frustration in his inability to get the progress he hopes for from the Ward. There may be untoward stake pressure that also contributes to this frustration.

b) Be appreciative about what does get done and people who serve with passion -- there are always at least a couple.

c) Be more careful in who he asks to take what calling. I have learned to expose passion and to align work around the passions and talents of people.

d) Let the frequency of people asking to be released be a measure of his own organization's leadership. Yep -- that's it -- a measure of HIS OWN LEADERSHIPS. A sign of poor leadership and sometimes, design of the work, is turnover. So, when people ask for releases, that is a sign something has been amiss, unless the reasons are uncontrollable (if shared).

e) Create a dynamic team of people characterized by empowerment, democratic decision making, strong personal relationships, spiritual, efficient meetings, servant leadership, meaningful thanks and appreciation, and co-missioning.
They have now added my e-mail address on the leaders page.
I don't understand why they would add your email address to the leaders page when they released you. Can you help me understand that?
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

Post Reply