Josh Weed is divorcing

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LookingHard
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by LookingHard » 28 Jan 2018, 18:24

LookingHard wrote:
26 Jan 2018, 17:06
And I just found out that a couple that I know in my town that are in this same situation are about to announce they are also getting a divorce. My heart is broken.
I saw this couple at church today and I normally shake the guys hand (he is a friend that I have hung out with at times) and usually I will say hi to his wife. But today I avoided them because I knew I would fall apart, or at least make others (including my wife) ask what is going on? They have not told me when they are going to announce.

Curt Sunshine
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by Curt Sunshine » 28 Jan 2018, 18:48

I respect his post about it tremendously.

God bless them on their journey. May there be a road.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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nibbler
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by nibbler » 29 Jan 2018, 05:50

I know a couple that were in their shoes. They got a divorce and both remarried. I can only assume that both are living happy lives now. Growth hurts, life hurts, so try to grow towards something that will make life hurt less.
I am.
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LookingHard
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by LookingHard » 29 Jan 2018, 05:54

I had a son that went to UVU for a while and I suspected he might have a faith crisis. There is one person there that I really liked Boyd Petersen. He is on the believing side, but tollerant and understanding of others with different conclusions. I think I remember he was involved with Dialog for quite a while. He is also program coordinator for Mormon Studies at UVU. I was going to point my son at Boyd to have a chat if it came up.

If you know about Boyd Petersen, you probably know he married Zina Nibley, a daughter of Hugh Nibley.

I just found out that he and his wife divorced because he is gay and they can't make it work. They still deeply love each other still. So sad.

I also heard that Jerilyn Hassell Pool actually "officiated" in some sort of ceremony for their divorce (sounds like the Petersens were fully involved). The Petersens apparently did "vows" for how they were going forward, but Jerilyn gave her own vows to them and asked others to do the same. She said, "We promise to honor and cherish your diverging paths, we respect and protect your lives together and apart. And we won't talk shit about you behind your backs."

Roy
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by Roy » 29 Jan 2018, 09:56

I believe that it is worth mentioning that LDS poet and author Carol Lynn Pearson and her husband made a similar choice. From her biography:
A book that brought major recognition in a different way is “Goodbye, I Love You”, the story of her life with her husband, a homosexual man struggling with the conflicts this brought to his life and marriage. After twelve years and four children, the couple ended their marriage and vowed to remain good friends. Six years later, in Carol Lynn’s home, where she was taking care of him, Gerald died of AIDS. Believing their story could help many others, Ms. Pearson decided to tell it.
It is also worth mentioning that the church does not recommend entering mixed orientation marriages (although by process of elimination that just leaves LDS homosexuals celibate and alone).
"It is not so much the pain and suffering of life which crushes the individual as it is its meaninglessness and hopelessness." C. A. Elwood

“It is not the function of religion to answer all the questions about God’s moral government of the universe, but to give one courage, through faith, to go on in the face of questions he never finds the answer to in his present status.” TPC: Harold B. Lee 223

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LookingHard
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by LookingHard » 29 Jan 2018, 11:55

Roy wrote:
29 Jan 2018, 09:56
I believe that it is worth mentioning that LDS poet and author Carol Lynn Pearson and her husband made a similar choice. From her biography:
A book that brought major recognition in a different way is “Goodbye, I Love You”, the story of her life with her husband, a homosexual man struggling with the conflicts this brought to his life and marriage. After twelve years and four children, the couple ended their marriage and vowed to remain good friends. Six years later, in Carol Lynn’s home, where she was taking care of him, Gerald died of AIDS. Believing their story could help many others, Ms. Pearson decided to tell it.
It is also worth mentioning that the church does not recommend entering mixed orientation marriages (although by process of elimination that just leaves LDS homosexuals celibate and alone).
I would say that the church NO LONGER recommends this as it was very common years ago that they did.

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dande48
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by dande48 » 29 Jan 2018, 14:56

LookingHard wrote:
29 Jan 2018, 11:55
I would say that the church NO LONGER recommends this as it was very common years ago that they did.
I would go so far as to say, some believe strongly in the Church's past recommendation. I've got a couple of gay friends, who are set on having a mixed-oriented heterosexual, temple marriage. The Church just no longer claims it'll "cure" them.
"The whole world is a comedy to those that think, a tragedy to those that feel." - Horace Walpole

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Curt Sunshine
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by Curt Sunshine » 29 Jan 2018, 18:25

Officially, the Church discourages mixed-orientation marriage. However, people tend to believe the Church's policies don't change, so they hold tightly to what they were taught or learned in their late adolescence and/or early adulthood.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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mom3
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by mom3 » 29 Jan 2018, 20:32

LH - Wow. Just wow. I can't find any corroborating details to support the Boyd Petersen divorce, but wow if it did happen.
"I stayed because it was God and Jesus Christ that I wanted to follow and be like, not individual human beings." Chieko Okazaki Dialogue interview

"I am coming to envision a new persona for the Church as humble followers of Jesus Christ....Joseph and his early followers came forth with lots of triumphalist rhetoric, but I think we need a new voice, one of humility, friendship and service. We should teach people to believe in God because it will soften their hearts and make them more willing to serve." - Richard Bushman

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LookingHard
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Re: Josh Weed is divorcing

Post by LookingHard » 30 Jan 2018, 05:48

mom3 wrote:
29 Jan 2018, 20:32
LH - Wow. Just wow. I can't find any corroborating details to support the Boyd Petersen divorce, but wow if it did happen.
I am sorry that I made this statement. I was told that I was incorrect and I made an assumption that it was Boyd that was gay. I was told it was his wife that couldn't make it work due to her orientation.

And let me be clear - my reason for bringing it up was how painful it was to see this happening in many places and one person that I had admiration for.

I wish I had not even mentioned the Petersen's as I don't know how public this even is. So I would ask that we not focus on them - and for that matter Josh and Lolly. I feel for each and every one of them. A friend mentioned that in his area he is aware of more than a handful of people that are in the same situation where he lives. This is heavy on my heart at this time.

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