Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

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dande48
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by dande48 » 02 Apr 2018, 06:10

Truthfully, ever since I first got home from my mission, I could count the number of times I was home taught on one hand. Up until the last year and a half, I still did home teaching myself, but since decided I needed to turn down all official Church assignments (HT included). My wife has had a difficult experience with VT as well. She hasn't been visit taught for the past several years, and the last time she was given a VT assignment, her companion decided to take out their sisters to lunch (as she always did) without inviting my wife. It really hurt my wife's feelings.

I wonder with the new system if we'll receive some level of Church fellowship. In the past, a few select members were better "home teachers" than our own home teachers were. If we needed a ride to the airport, or help moving a couch, they were there for us. They would always try to have an actual conversation with us, whenever they saw us, and did everything they could to make us feel welcome. They'd invite us over for dinner and parties. They never gave a "lesson", never called me to repentance (although they knew my disaffection), only fellowshipped us with the pure love of Christ. Unfortunately, there's no one like that in our current ward, and as a result I've found myself less "tolerant". If we get a little "ministry" our way, I think it'd help quite a lot with my engagement.
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DarkJedi
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by DarkJedi » 02 Apr 2018, 06:32

LookingHard wrote:
02 Apr 2018, 03:50
I am kind of with GBSmith thinking, "So what has changed?" They are backing off on the 1 visit per month assumption (partially because the stats were a bit depressing AND many active members felt it was not helping their family) and they are backing off the reporting. So maybe it has reduced the guilt over HT/VT (which is good), but I don't see it as all that much of change - certainly not a huge revelation from on high.
I agree that I don't believe this is really a "Thus saith the Lord" moment, but I think the things you mention as little changes are actually huge. It's easy to find out what a family's needs are without the monthly visit with accompanying "lesson." Granted a single text is probably not going to do the trick, but if they're active people you know they'll share if they need something. In my own ward where there is a relatively large number of hardcore inactives it takes away a good amount of guilt.
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Beefster
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by Beefster » 02 Apr 2018, 07:29

I think there will be less overall engagement, but it will be more meaningful. Quality is more important than quantity.

The problem with home teaching was it was so formal that it didn't really leave much room to develop genuine relationships. That said, I think it's going to take a few years before people really figure out what this "ministering" means and it will probably look a lot like home teaching for a while.

Not being guilt tripped in EQ about home teaching is a welcome change.
Last edited by Beefster on 02 Apr 2018, 07:46, edited 2 times in total.
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SilentDawning
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by SilentDawning » 02 Apr 2018, 07:42

If I can draw on my years of studying and teaching and implementing change and studying drivers of culture. The church has done a marvelous job of creating certain cultural variables that drive behavior. We may not agree with them all, but modesty, serving a mission, staying married, all those things. How about creating a culture of love in our wards? Ultimately, that is what this new program is all above. Loving each other. Not checking boxes or systemizing or programming love but actually loving others.

There are certain levers that drive culture. Talks at the podium, the informal comments people make, the behavior of leaders, how leaders interact with members, rites of passage, the frequency and content of training -- all these things create culture. It's time to make love part of our culture. I seriously question if the woman who crucified my character to the entire ward leadership years ago would have done it had the culture of love been as strong as our culture of "every worthy young man should serve a mission", for example. And I seriously question if our Bishopric would have handled her misbehavior as they did (a reprimand and indifference to me) if the church was eye-ball deep in the love culture.
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Minyan Man
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by Minyan Man » 02 Apr 2018, 07:43

I read the letter from the first presidency & thought "this is way too general". When I got to the end of the letter,
there is a web site that explains how it works in detail: ministering.lds.org/eng. I encourage everyone to look it over.

You will be directed to:
https://providentliving.lds.org/leader/ ... s?lang=eng

I am hopefully encouraged.
There will need to be a lot of training.

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Beefster
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by Beefster » 02 Apr 2018, 07:46

According to the FAQ, it looks a bit like this is HT/VT with a new coat of paint and different expectations. Priesthood holders still are responsible for each household and sisters are responsible for other sisters. I was kinda hoping it would be something where men and women ministered as equals, though I do respect the need for having priesthood holders available to every family. This does still open the door to husband/wife companionships, which is a welcome change. (technically you could do it before, but that tended to be reserved for unusual circumstances.)
Boys are governed by rules. Men are governed by principles.

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SilentDawning
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by SilentDawning » 02 Apr 2018, 08:07

Another change is that husbands and wives can go ministering together. We got rebuked over that by TSM when he came to Toronto a few years ago. He punctuated his rebuke with "don't leave those prospective elders at home". But I guess we were ahead of the curve....Also, these ministering interviews occur "preferably" with both members of the companionship present, but you count your interview as complete if only one member of the companionship is there. Plus, these interviews can happen over the phone!!!!

Another thing is that the ministering companionship determines how to best meet the needs of the family by counseling with the "family" or members being ministered to.

You don't have to give a message if you don't want -- and ministering can mean attending the person's soccer game -- not a formal meeting. All very practical meaningful ways of connecting with people other than this silliness we've been trying to manage all these years.

Makes me want to step up and be a leader again -- almost :lol:
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"Stage 5 is where you no longer believe the gospel as its literally or traditionally taught. Nonetheless, you find your own way to be active and at peace within it". -- SD

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

My introduction: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1576

AmyJ
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by AmyJ » 02 Apr 2018, 08:26

mom3 wrote:
01 Apr 2018, 20:08
Not mine. I have been giving and receiving like this for 3 or 4 years. I am ahead of the curve.

It took my visiting teachers a bit to get used to it, but now we are pros.

I also announced a million times over that I preferred visiting friending to visiting teaching. I get taught all the time. I could read the message myself. I wanted friends or carer's, not tutors.

I am happy to hear the entire church is joining me.
I have been trying to minister like this for the past year and a half or so. I usually disregard the lesson entirely, and come prepared with a spiritual thought that a) would probably work for them in their situation (from what I knew of it), b) had meaning for me.

Last fall I had my assigned VT tell me to my face that she did not like me for some of the choices I had made and felt that being assigned to me was a learning opportunity for her. To give her credit, she made it clear it was all her and her problem. I was not mad (am still am not mad at her) - I was horrified because I missed all the non-verbal communications regarding how she felt about me and felt stupid and out of the loop. After counseling with my mother (who serves in a R.S. Presidency), I requested a different sister be assigned as my Visiting Teacher when I mentioned the story to my Relief Society President - who was my friend and could minister to me the way I needed. The paperwork never got updated, but I considered the 2nd sister my Visiting Teacher and invited her into my life to minister to me. The actually assigned VT was not that interested in being involved in my life after that 1 visit.

I enjoyed shocking our Home Teachers by tracking them down, and then pretty much telling them 1-2x in a month that they could come over if it worked for them.

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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by Roy » 02 Apr 2018, 10:53

Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?
I believe that feeling included and wanted would help me and my family. To be honest the best way to minister to my family is through my children. If my children are befriended and fellowshipped DW and I will come along for the ride. We will even serve as much as we can in the youth organization.
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LookingHard
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Re: Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

Post by LookingHard » 02 Apr 2018, 11:13

Will the new ministering program change your level of engagement with "ministering"?

I don't think so. I have not given a "lesson" to a home teaching family in probably a decade. But I have pushed for and have 3 divorced much older women assigned (2 of which are now unemployed) and I spend a few hours every week helping them keep their house in working order. I LOVE doing that. I HATE giving a lesson while kids are squirming and wishing I would just leave.

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