Crumbling testimony

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Always Thinking
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Joined: 29 Dec 2015, 11:46

Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Always Thinking » 31 Dec 2015, 15:01

Both my husband and I agree that if our children decide to go on a mission, we will tell them to call us if anything serious is going on (their mental health is seriously suffering, abuse of any kind, illness or injury that they won't allow them to tend to properly). Or even if they need advice on something that's troubling them. I do not believe it is beneficial to cut them off from family. I don't understand what exactly the church thinks that will prepare them for. There aren't any times in your life where you're forced to never be able to contact family except on specific holidays. I see the positives of having them learn to make decisions for themselves to become more responsible, but that's not what's happening. You can learn that when you go off to college. I do kind of see what you mean about teaching conformity. I know my husband saw many TBM missionaries start breaking the rules just because the white handbook was so extremely hard to follow and they would see no progress for their efforts. But they would see people who weren't obeying the rules getting baptisms. It went against everything they'd been taught and it broke a lot of them and they decided to rebel against the mission. So really, in some cases it backfires. I wish there was a way to find out how often it actually happens. Sorry, kind of started rambling there

Curt Sunshine
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Curt Sunshine » 31 Dec 2015, 15:30

I have worked for a while at colleges and universities around the US and see regularly the impact of parents who can't let go for even a week (and, sometimes, a day) and for whom any tiny problem leads to questions and suggestions about leaving school and going home.

I think contact more often than twice a year would be good, but I understand the policy of limitations.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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Always Thinking
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Always Thinking » 31 Dec 2015, 15:44

@ Ray yeah, I definitely don't want my kids to call me all the time or anything, only for necessary things. I would like them to solve most things on their own, but for them to know i'm available if things get to be too much for them. I would only suggest they come home if it was causing serious mental health issues or physical health issues that weren't being addressed, or if they were being abused I would do everything in my power to get them with a new companion

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Minyan Man
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Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 13:40

Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Minyan Man » 31 Dec 2015, 15:54

Bugger, you describe your testimony as
crumbling
Is there a chance that it is just changing?
My assumption is: over time we change, our testimony changes, our knowledge of gospel principles change, etc.
Not to mention: our bodies, minds & spirits change.

For me, the reality is: we should expect change in ourselves. That is eternal progression.

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Always Thinking
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Always Thinking » 31 Dec 2015, 16:03

@minyan you are definitely right. I think the shock of how much it's changing is what made me think it must be going completely downhill. I don't remember if it was this post or another where I posted that I have always been a Molly Mormon and have never seriously doubted the church so seeing myself doubting several things at once made me worry that I may leave the church and made me feel horribly guilty. I also have anxiety that I've been working through for the last year as well so that's where the 'blowing things out of proportion' may also be coming from. 'I'm doubting several aspects of the church?? What's going to happen if I leave the church?' I have been obsessed about this whole thing for a few days but I can feel myself slowly calming down and feeling more like I may do some things that aren't church doctrine at some point, but I don't think I'll leave completely. At least from where I am at right now. And I am feeling more comfortable with that idea

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amateurparent
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by amateurparent » 01 Jan 2016, 06:16

West wrote, " ut hey, you know what, let your testimony crumble. Let it fall and explode and release all the tension trying to hold it together. If a building crumbles, it's better to tear it down and build anew. Sort through the pieces, find the best parts, and build it up newer. A little better. And if you ever find yourself in a situation where someone somewhere is judging one of my dear missionaries who never reached that golden number, or a young man who's almost 26 and ducks his head when someone asks when he's going to put in his papers because they don't know how much he's struggling, please stand up for them. The culture won't change any faster if we don't give our part of it a push."
West, I love that paragraph. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences.
I have no advance degrees in parenting. No national credentials. I am an amateur parent. I read, study, and learn all I can to be the best parent possible. Every time I think I have reached expert status with one child for one stage in their life, something changes and I am back to amateur status again. Now when I really mess up, I just apologize to my child, and explain that I am indeed an amateur .. I'm still learning how to do this right.

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SamBee
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by SamBee » 01 Jan 2016, 13:01

I take it you know what the meaning of "bugger" is. You might want to change your username. A bugger is someone who commits buggery.

http://legal-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/Buggery
DASH1730 "An Area Authority...[was] asked...who...would go to the Telestial kingdom. His answer: "murderers, adulterers and a lot of surprised Mormons!"'
1ST PRES 1978 "[LDS] believe...there is truth in many religions and philosophies...good and great religious leaders... have raised the spiritual, moral, and ethical awareness of their people. When we speak of The [LDS] as the only true church...it is...authorized to administer the ordinances...by Jesus Christ... we do not mean... it is the only teacher of truth."

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Always Thinking
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Always Thinking » 01 Jan 2016, 13:12

Oops! Nope, I just thought of a word to do with bugs. I will have to try changing my name

How do I change my name on here?

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SamBee
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Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by SamBee » 01 Jan 2016, 13:43

Bit of a swearword in Australia, New Zealand, Ireland & UK too!
DASH1730 "An Area Authority...[was] asked...who...would go to the Telestial kingdom. His answer: "murderers, adulterers and a lot of surprised Mormons!"'
1ST PRES 1978 "[LDS] believe...there is truth in many religions and philosophies...good and great religious leaders... have raised the spiritual, moral, and ethical awareness of their people. When we speak of The [LDS] as the only true church...it is...authorized to administer the ordinances...by Jesus Christ... we do not mean... it is the only teacher of truth."

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Always Thinking
Posts: 189
Joined: 29 Dec 2015, 11:46

Re: Crumbling testimony

Post by Always Thinking » 01 Jan 2016, 13:54

I'd heard the word used by people from England, but just thought it was a crass word like stupid. I can't figure out how to change my username though, do I email the mods?

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