Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

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DarkJedi
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Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by DarkJedi » 15 Dec 2013, 07:41

It has been a while, but it looks like my name may have come to the top of "The Rescue" list again. The visit is scheduled for this afternoon, different priesthood leader this time (the others were from the bishop and HPGL). I have not had a "rescue" attempt since I've been coming here, and my perspective and willingness to share my thoughts have changed quite a bit since the last one. In my previous visits I had been pretty frank about my lack of belief in things like prayer and revelation, so it will be interesting to see what he knows and what he asks about.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

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SilentDawning
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by SilentDawning » 15 Dec 2013, 08:31

My stance is that you have to give them nothing to go on -- or they will hold it against you over the long-term. Whatever you say will be all over PEC...I view it as if the press has asked me to comment on some controversial action I have taken, and its like a scrum.

I usually stonewall, indicating full activity isn't something I feel passionate about right now, etcetera. I comment that we have all been in the church for decades (if true) so any conversation we could have right now, we would have had several times with other people in the past -- I don't see the point of going into it. I usually end with some hope of returning to full activity some time, but not right now.

Good luck -- looking forward to hearing how it goes if you want to share afterwards
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

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DarkJedi
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by DarkJedi » 15 Dec 2013, 09:13

I agree with you, SD, mostly from what I have learned here. Unfortunately I have already spilled the beans in the past at the rescue attempts I didn't know were rescue attempts. But as I said, my perspective and willingness to be open have changed over the past few months I have been here.

Anyway, the guy just called and rescheduled for next Sunday because he came up with a conflict.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

My Introduction

Curt Sunshine
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by Curt Sunshine » 15 Dec 2013, 11:18

All said with a smile:
"I'm doing really well right now. Thanks for your concern."

"I'm working through a bunch of things right now. Thanks for your concern."

"Pres. Uchtdorf said there's room in the Church for people who see things differently than others. I'm figuring out exactly what I personally believe right now. Thanks for your concern."

"No, I don't want to talk about anything specific right now. I'll let you know if I have any specific questions. Thanks for your concern."
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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mackay11
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by mackay11 » 15 Dec 2013, 15:47

DarkJedi - best of luck with the delayed visit. I agree with what has been said so far that you don't have to give them lots of details.
Ray Degraw wrote:All said with a smile:
"I'm doing really well right now. Thanks for your concern."

"I'm working through a bunch of things right now. Thanks for your concern."

"Pres. Uchtdorf said there's room in the Church for people who see things differently than others. I'm figuring out exactly what I personally believe right now. Thanks for your concern."

"No, I don't want to talk about anything specific right now. I'll let you know if I have any specific questions. Thanks for your concern."
Given I'm going to be involved in "The Rescue" as BML, I really, really want to start with this attitude in mind. Given I can strongly empathize with people who stay away (or only just stay) I hope I can be a better visitor. A sister came to church last week that we'd not seen in months. I've known her a few years so went and gave her a hug. I told her we'd be happy to come and visit her if that's what she wanted but would also be very comfortable respecting her space if that's what she needed at the moment.

I've got my first branch council this Tuesday. It'll be interesting to see how I get on with that approach with a bunch of auxiliary presidents :)

VikingCompass

Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by VikingCompass » 15 Dec 2013, 16:18

Here's a stumper:

"When I come to church the Spirit flees...and so do I."

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SilentDawning
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by SilentDawning » 15 Dec 2013, 17:13

After visiting over 200 homes and trying to "commit" scores of less active people to activity, I would like to add my own version of a successful rescue effort.

"Make the experience so good that when people spontaneously come to church, they are inspired to come again".

I can cite one Ward that did this. I had been less active for about 7 years, and had moved into the area. Our family started attending the Ward and it totally energized us. I ended up in the Bishopric, started paying tithing again, went to the temple monthly, and started really engaging with the experience.

In short, the Ward met my expectations of what a Ward full of people who had made baptismal commitments should be doing -- at least -- enough people did it that I could believe in it. We came home spiritually fed and it ignited my desire to be part of the experience again.

i "liken" the church to a restaurant that advertises the best hamburgers in the world. And then, when you show up for the hamburgers, they are out of them. Not so in all Wards, but its been the rule rather than the exception in my three decades in the church.
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

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QuestionAbound
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by QuestionAbound » 15 Dec 2013, 19:01

SilentDawning wrote:After visiting over 200 homes and trying to "commit" scores of less active people to activity, I would like to add my own version of a successful rescue effort.

"Make the experience so good that when people spontaneously come to church, they are inspired to come again".

I can cite one Ward that did this. I had been less active for about 7 years, and had moved into the area. Our family started attending the Ward and it totally energized us. I ended up in the Bishopric, started paying tithing again, went to the temple monthly, and started really engaging with the experience.

In short, the Ward met my expectations of what a Ward full of people who had made baptismal commitments should be doing -- at least -- enough people did it that I could believe in it. We came home spiritually fed and it ignited my desire to be part of the experience again.
I would love to hear what the church did or said that made it work for you.
Could you share with us?

Curt Sunshine
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Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by Curt Sunshine » 15 Dec 2013, 19:02

I've said for a long time that the best thing we can do in terms of reactivation is to make our meetings more spiritually filling.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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SilentDawning
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Joined: 09 May 2010, 19:55

Re: Looks like my name has come to the top of the list again

Post by SilentDawning » 15 Dec 2013, 19:43

I would love to hear what the church did or said that made it work for you.
Could you share with us?
1. They were organized and prepared. Almost every sacrament meeting talk, every lesson, every leader showed there had been significant preparation for whatever they undertook.

2. The comments of teachers and participants were full of intelligence. I felt like I couldn't keep up -- they made me stretch.

3. They were friendly to me personally. When we finally moved into the ward as a family, I had so many people walk up to me and introduce themselves out of friendliness. It was great.

4. There was an absence of class structure. There were a lot of people who were average people -- low to medium incomes. But many of the people there were highly talented, self-employed people, managers, lawyers -- people of talent and substance. Many had huge homes and a substantial amount of wealth. It was widespread. Talent and wealth without the arrogance. And you couldn't see any evidence of cliques or anything. Everyone worked together.

[note: it wasn't the wealth that attracted me, though, it was their absence of arrogance in spite of the wealth]

5. They were doers. They worked on projects without any of the drama or conflict that I normally see. Everyone followed through on assignments. I saw the handbook almost fully implemented even though it wasn't a Utah ward. i remember asking for chapel cleaners in priesthood. 3/4 of the room filled with hands -- and these were members of the Stake Presidency, youth, and average people too. The commitment was infectious!

6. It culminated when I was asked to join the Bishopric. All the people in the Ward -- these talented people and average people alike accepted me and treated me with the same deference you would give to anyone in a position of authority. I was amazed that they accepted me the way they did -- even though many had much more talent and experience in the church and outside the church than I did. I even made mistakes at the pulpit when I was new and I didn't feel any kind of lack of respect or anything -- just support.

7. I felt the spirit regularly. Almost every Sunday I came home feeling "swept" inside -- cleansed, so to speak. My wife reported the same thing.

I could go on -- but the short answer is that they lived the gospel in all respects. And they had humility at the same time. They lived it the way I thought we were supposed to live it -- and met my expectations of what it means to commit to a religion.

It was deeply inspiring and activated me and my family -- and it lasted for a few years, even after we moved into a Ward that was exactly the opposite of this particular Ward.
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

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