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Re: Tonight was hard

Posted: 03 May 2019, 07:06
by DarkJedi
I know this is a different point of view on this, but I have given it some thought and it fits. Perhaps this is really what endure to the end means. From my own experience and perspective, I have endured quite a bit.

Re: Tonight was hard

Posted: 05 May 2019, 12:34
by Roy
Welcome Jax,
For me it has been helpful to establish boundaries with the church. I reduce the church footprint in my life to what I feel is a sustainable level. We have many friends and activities outside of the church. This allows me to personally acknowledge some frustrating elements in my church experience without having it affect my equilibrium. "Wow, that comment in SS today was crazy judgmental and sexist. I am glad that I am home and that I do not need to think about it for another week."
I also have a growing and evolving understanding of the gospel which includes to idea that we humans get many things wrong. Prophets, churches, and scripture can all be wrong to some degree. Life can be lived and enjoyed perfectly fine without being right all the time. I like the concept of a continuing restoration because this means that the church was necessarily "less restored" in times past and may have even taken a dead end detour from stuff that matters only to course correct and "repent" later on. This helps me to believe in the church and also see some flaws past and present.
I agree about the sexism part. I do not think that I was ever really aware of male privilidge until I served in primary. I got praised regularly for being a positive male role model and also bringing my priesthood spirit with me to the primary (not a direct quote but that was the gist of it). I am so sorry for the ways in which we hold our female members back. I want my daughter to have the support system and opportunities available through the church program but also to take it all with a grain of salt and refuse to let some of the antiquated ideas define her.

Anyway. Focus on what you do believe. Don't make any rash decisions. Don't dump all at once. Don't throw out the baby with the bath water.
Welcome to our community. You are not alone.