I need a bias free atmosphere.

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BlackSheep
Posts: 1
Joined: 05 Apr 2018, 08:09

I need a bias free atmosphere.

Post by BlackSheep » 05 Apr 2018, 14:03

I'm here because I needed a bias free (or less biased) environment for discussion about my relationship with the church. Where I live, it isn't incredibly common to come across LDS members, let alone LDS members with doubts. So, this is the best hope I have for finding a support group.

I was raised in the church. My father's side of the family has been LDS pretty much since the church was established. My mother is a convert. I've always struggled with religion. I'm married and have been for some years.

My side of the family is more or less split down the middle on religion. My mother and half my siblings are not active/agnostic/atheist, my father and the other half of my siblings are orthodox. My family does tolerably well considering the differences.

My husband's family is all orthodox - except him. My husband is agnostic (a somewhat recent development). His family doesn't do well with differing opinions. We are often hear the word "intellectual", but they use it synonymously with "Black Sheep". It makes my husband anxious, because he hasn't told them the extent of his views, and it makes me depressed because I was previously labeled "Black Sheep" because I am literally the only person (male and female, in-laws included) who didn't serve a mission. So now I feel like the "Black Sheep" label will stick.

The only person I know that doesn't give me a biased opinion on a topic is my husband. He will discuss topics but he doesn't want to influence my religious decisions. So, I've found myself in need of more material to help make my decision and another set of ears. I hope to gain some clarity and find some help with my questions here.

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DarkJedi
Posts: 5996
Joined: 24 Aug 2013, 20:53

Re: I need a bias free atmosphere.

Post by DarkJedi » 05 Apr 2018, 15:30

Welcome. I don't have a ton of time at the moment, just a couple quick comments:

Everybody is biased at least some. I can't guarantee no bias here, but we do tolerate free thinking very well and there are some great people here.

You should consider yourself lucky (blessed?) you have a spouse you can at least talk to.

This is a safe place, come contribute to our discussions!
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

My Introduction

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On Own Now
Posts: 1624
Joined: 18 Jan 2012, 12:45

Re: I need a bias free atmosphere.

Post by On Own Now » 05 Apr 2018, 15:41

Welcome, BlackSheep. I'm glad you have found this site; it has been and continues to be very helpful for me. I look forward to hearing your voice here.
BlackSheep wrote:
05 Apr 2018, 14:03
[My husband] will discuss topics but he doesn't want to influence my religious decisions.
I like your husband already.
"Let us therefore no longer pass judgment on one another, but resolve instead never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of another." --Romans 14:13

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SilentDawning
Posts: 6806
Joined: 09 May 2010, 19:55

Re: I need a bias free atmosphere.

Post by SilentDawning » 05 Apr 2018, 17:31

Well, you will get less bias than if you go to an orthodox forum. There you can predict what most people will say based on your church experience.

Here, there will be a diversity of opinion.

I assume you decision is your relationship with the church -- what options are you considering?
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"Stage 5 is where you no longer believe the gospel as its literally or traditionally taught. Nonetheless, you find your own way to be active and at peace within it". -- SD

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

My introduction: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1576

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