Thinking about coming back to church

Public forum, tell us about yourself and what brings you to StayLDS!
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Harriet Naomi
Posts: 11
Joined: 09 Aug 2016, 15:43
Location: West Coast, US

Thinking about coming back to church

Post by Harriet Naomi » 19 Aug 2016, 12:41

Hello everyone, here's my intro!
I have been reading her for a week or two and it seems like a very supportive and helpful place.

I was born and raised in the LDS church in a small town in Northern CA. My Mom's family were members from the beginning of the church and my Dad was a nonmember who was baptized a few years after the marriage. I went to BYU and later married a nonmember. We divorced after 30 years of marriage. We have two sons. My sons were baptized in their teens, but were not active for very long.
I have not been active in the church for most of my adult life for a variety of reasons. I have always thought of myself as a Mormon but not an orthodox believer.
I am retired now and have been feeling a need or desire to reconnect with my people. :P I have great memories of growing up in the church but was not able to make it work for me in the past. I will post more on the support board so this doesn't get too long.

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Minyan Man
Posts: 1376
Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 13:40

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by Minyan Man » 19 Aug 2016, 17:30

Welcome HN, Your story sounds familiar. I hope we can help. The most interesting part of your post is the following:
Harriet Naomi wrote:I have great memories of growing up in the church but was not able to make it work for me in the past.
What was it that you couldn't make it work for you?

My Wife & I came back into activity after we retired. I found this period of our life to be reflective & wanted to settle the issues that made my
life complicated. We wanted to find peace in our lives or move into something else. My only advice at this time is to take it slow. Make changes
on your own terms. I wish you peace on your journey. Keep coming back.
Last edited by Minyan Man on 19 Aug 2016, 20:00, edited 1 time in total.

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SilentDawning
Posts: 6032
Joined: 09 May 2010, 19:55

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by SilentDawning » 19 Aug 2016, 19:47

I had the same question as Minyan Man -- welcome to the site!
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"Stage 5 is where you no longer believe the gospel as its literally or traditionally taught. Nonetheless, you find your own way to be active and at peace within it". -- SD

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

My introduction: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1576

Harriet Naomi
Posts: 11
Joined: 09 Aug 2016, 15:43
Location: West Coast, US

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by Harriet Naomi » 19 Aug 2016, 23:27

Thanks for the welcome. :wave:

Lots of reasons church did not work for me. Mostly it was due to working lots of weekends, nonmember husband was not religious and preferred for me to spend the weekends I had off with him and the family. I also lived in the same ward with my parents and my Mom was uncomfortably intrusive and controlling especially about church stuff which made it difficult for me to participate.

I was aware of historical issues quite early on since my family history was entwined with church history. My great great grandfather was a great journal keeper!

I felt there was something wrong with me for quite a long time because I never really had that burning testimony so many people talk about.
I still don't, but I'm OK with that now. I've mellowed out and am pretty agnostic about testimony and truth claims of the church.

I do find church history and LDS issues interesting and like to be around LDS folks.

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nibbler
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Joined: 14 Nov 2013, 07:34
Location: Ten miles west of the exact centre of the universe

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by nibbler » 20 Aug 2016, 04:53

Thanks for the intro.
Harriet Naomi wrote:I also lived in the same ward with my parents...
I bet that makes it tough. Maybe this is more related to belonging to the same ward your whole life than being in the same ward as your parents but I imagine that it's a struggle, many ward members still viewing you as that kid they always knew.
The time to relax is when you don't have time for it. - Sydney J. Harris

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DarkJedi
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Joined: 24 Aug 2013, 20:53

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by DarkJedi » 21 Aug 2016, 05:23

Welcome to the forums. Ask away, we're here to listen and offer our individual perspectives. I recognize how hard it can be going back to church after being away for a long time.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

My Introduction

Ray DeGraw
Site Admin
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Joined: 21 Oct 2008, 20:24
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Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by Ray DeGraw » 21 Aug 2016, 09:57

Welcome.

As DJ said in another thread, we all are helpers and helpees. We don't pretend to have "the one true answers", and we don't agree unanimously about much, but we support those who are trying to find and/or live their own faith within the general framework of the LDS Church.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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Heber13
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Location: In the Middle

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by Heber13 » 21 Aug 2016, 10:45

Welcome! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

I think when we see the church for what it is, we can find things that enhance our lives and fill our lives with opportunities for peace.

I think the key is loving others as they are.

I am guessing you have experiences and unique talents to go to church and bless others who need your story and example.

Glad you joined the forum. I look forward to learning more from your posts.
Luke: "Why didn't you tell me? You told me Vader betrayed and murdered my father."
Obi-Wan: "Your father... was seduced by the dark side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and became Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So what I told you was true... from a certain point of view."
Luke: "A certain point of view?"
Obi-Wan: "Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to...depend greatly on our point of view."

Harriet Naomi
Posts: 11
Joined: 09 Aug 2016, 15:43
Location: West Coast, US

Re: Thinking about coming back to church

Post by Harriet Naomi » 21 Aug 2016, 16:17

Thanks so much for the welcoming comments. I truly appreciate it.
I'm not really looking for answers at this time of my life, just a community to belong to and contribute to in some small way.
I guess reaching out here is the first step.

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