For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

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wayfarer
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by wayfarer » 28 Feb 2012, 14:57

Zelph wrote:Now for the rest. If I were open an honest I would say that I am a closeted atheist that attends the LDS church. Given the breadth of my spiritual experiences I no longer had an issue with historical problems.
Zelph, Although I had posted to this thread, I had not read, until today, your very long posts.

Thank you for sharing the stuff you have. I am not so much of a closet atheist, but fully and completely against the theistic definitions found in christianity and in some aspects of mormonism. Yet, to be spiritually attuned, as you obviously are from your experiences, begs the question as to the source of these amazing feelings.

My journey as a spiritual wayfarer has taken me literally around the world: to china, in search of original tao, to india, in search of enlightenment, to the depths of islam, catholicism, protestant christianity, and of course back to mormonism. It's all good. it's all bad. it's just what it is: religion points to something, but it is not that something, and any definition in religion is just speculation as to the nature of whatever it is we might call god or not.

I come back to mormonism because this is home to me: generations of family have lived in this culture, and i find in it enough of what I consider the truth that I stand by my personal, unorthodox way of looking at the faith.

I really appreciate the similarity you express in your point of view, and hope you find joy in your personal journey.

peace.
"Those who speak don't know, those who know don't speak." Lao Tzu.
My seat in the bloggernacle: http://wayfaringfool.blogspot.com

Featherina

Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by Featherina » 09 Mar 2012, 14:53

Zelph wrote:Because of that, I usually avoid Gospel Doctrine class and instead attend gospel principles. I love the earnest faith and real questions asked and I generally try to be an asset in the class.
I like Gospel Principles better too.
Usually it's more applicable to life... more time to discuss the "basics" which are really not basic at all.

Welcome, Zelph. :)

afterall
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by afterall » 09 Mar 2012, 20:52

Zelph, I love your mother! My kind of person!

Zelph
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by Zelph » 09 Jul 2015, 12:40

I know I posted and ran, but after a couple years of struggle then living the last year without taking Mormonism into consideration. We decided as a family to resign.

My eldest daughter's baptism or lack thereof was the jumping off point to living a year without listening to mormon advice or guidance. We are much happier.

It's weird to think about it though. I'm really sad about the fact that as a whole we are much happier. Our marriage is stronger. The sex is better than it has ever been. Just having Sundays to go on family outings has been wonderful.

As we drift more and more distant from the culture and tribe that raised us I keep getting hit by just how weird it all was. It feels like a different life and one I won't return to.

Sorry guys, we couldn't stay :?

2 of my siblings have also left the church in the last couple of years.

Roy
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by Roy » 09 Jul 2015, 13:06

Thanks for the update Zelph!

I do recommend that you not officially resign in order to leave options open - but I honor and respect your decisions in any case.

I am genuinely happy for you and your family that you have found joy together as a family.
Zelph wrote:I keep getting hit by just how weird it all was.
Yeah, the moving to the desert to live plural marriage because God told them to is definitely strange, tabloid worthy, material.

May God bless you in your journey.
"It is not so much the pain and suffering of life which crushes the individual as it is its meaninglessness and hopelessness." C. A. Elwood

“It is not the function of religion to answer all the questions about God’s moral government of the universe, but to give one courage, through faith, to go on in the face of questions he never finds the answer to in his present status.” TPC: Harold B. Lee 223

"I struggle now with establishing my faith that God may always be there, but may not always need to intervene" Heber13

Zelph
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by Zelph » 09 Jul 2015, 13:25

Thank you. I really appreciate it and everyone who chimed in to help and offer advice.

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Heber13
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by Heber13 » 09 Jul 2015, 15:07

Zelph wrote:We are much happier.
It sounds like you are doing well, and choosing what is right for your family. God bless you on your path. It is a good thing to hear your family is better and you're happier. That is all that is important.
Luke: "Why didn't you tell me? You told me Vader betrayed and murdered my father."
Obi-Wan: "Your father... was seduced by the dark side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and became Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So what I told you was true... from a certain point of view."
Luke: "A certain point of view?"
Obi-Wan: "Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to...depend greatly on our point of view."

amateurparent
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by amateurparent » 09 Jul 2015, 15:52

Thanks for the update!

Hope you finished that engineering degree too ..

Best wishes.
I have no advance degrees in parenting. No national credentials. I am an amateur parent. I read, study, and learn all I can to be the best parent possible. Every time I think I have reached expert status with one child for one stage in their life, something changes and I am back to amateur status again. Now when I really mess up, I just apologize to my child, and explain that I am indeed an amateur .. I'm still learning how to do this right.

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SilentDawning
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by SilentDawning » 10 Jul 2015, 04:08

I appreciate the update too. I'm glad you are happy. How have your family reacted to your resignation? That was a key issue in the introduction of this thread.
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"Stage 5 is where you no longer believe the gospel as its literally or traditionally taught. Nonetheless, you find your own way to be active and at peace within it". -- SD

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

My introduction: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1576

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nibbler
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Re: For the first time I felt like I didn't belong

Post by nibbler » 10 Jul 2015, 06:28

Zelph wrote:It's weird to think about it though. I'm really sad about the fact that as a whole we are much happier. Our marriage is stronger. The sex is better than it has ever been. Just having Sundays to go on family outings has been wonderful.
That's what it's all about IMO, finding that way to be happy.

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