Status Update & Seeking Advice

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
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Status Update & Seeking Advice

Post by university » 28 Feb 2018, 23:13

Hello, StayLDS Ward!

It's been awhile. Some of you you may know me and some may not, but several months ago I quietly stepped away from the steeple (not having my records removed or anything like that) and also this site. I felt at peace with where I was at and it was the right decision for me at the time, however, I've occasionally came back here to lurk and check. Truthfully, despite my estrangement, a part of me is always going to be "LDS" and this has been a great resource for me even while away.

I'm coming in with a status update. I moved out of Utah and into another state shortly after I "left" the site. Life was good. Since I'm a young adult, it was a good time for exploring and living out a new identity without a lot of pressure from the largely LDS environment around me. No church attendance and happy to tell people I was raised Mormon and would further elaborate that I'm somewhat of a "cultural Mormon" if people wanted more of an explanation. I will say, though, that I was lacking community. Church options were kind of limited where I was and the few I did attend didn't suit my tastes (Mormonism is a tough act to follow, in my opinion). I also felt a bit of disconnect between myself and the Spirit (or whatever the Spirit is) and even God. Never-the-less, I feel right about my course of action only now I want to take some time to tap into my spiritual side again and reach out to God, although not in an orthodox religious setting.

I guess the reason for my status update is two part....

1:) I'm back in Utah temporarily but will be moving back out again in a couple of months. Of course, living with family members again, and possibly attending church temporarily, made me kind of nostalgic for this site. I'm not a fan of ex-Mormon sites because I feel like they quickly dissolve into anti-Church bitterness or patting each other on the back for figuring out that Mormonism is a "scam." I don't want to go to a support community like that. If anyone has some good suggestions of where I could go, please help. Also, if I'm still welcome to post around here sometimes, great. It's not my intention at all to undermine the purpose of this site. I don't want to lead people out of the church.

2:) Living with LDS (and non-LDS) family under one roof. Oh, man. I think I mentioned once on here that 2 of my siblings were going out of the church, 1 was on the way out, and I was left. Well...quite frankly, I'm having a hard time navigating morality/value differences between siblings when church isn't even a factor anymore (but it is for parents, and that plays a role). There's a particular situation that's already causing me a lot of stress to the point that I'm having trouble sleeping. I could use some advice but I don't want to discuss it on a public forum. If you're willing to listen, drop me a personal message.

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Re: Status Update & Seeking Advice

Post by DarkJedi » 01 Mar 2018, 07:27

1) I agree and that's partly what took me so long to find this site. I am aware of no other site that monitors the negativity as well as this site, nor am I aware of any other group like this one. I'm not tooting my own horn, I'm just saying there is a really great bunch of loving and accepting people here.

2) I'll listen. I don't always have the time to respond right away. PM sent. How are your siblings handling this same pressure?
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

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Re: Status Update & Seeking Advice

Post by Curt Sunshine » 01 Mar 2018, 15:14

Thanks for the update.

You are welcome here anytime you want to participate, since you won't try to post in opposition to our mission. You were a valuable member of this group when you posted regularly, and I have no concern about that changing now.
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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Re: Status Update & Seeking Advice

Post by mom3 » 01 Mar 2018, 16:31

I am so glad your back. Visit often. Good days and bad. Insights and thoughts help all of us.

Like DJ - PM if you need. I am happy to listen.
"I stayed because it was God and Jesus Christ that I wanted to follow and be like, not individual human beings." Chieko Okazaki Dialogue interview

"I am coming to envision a new persona for the Church as humble followers of Jesus Christ....Joseph and his early followers came forth with lots of triumphalist rhetoric, but I think we need a new voice, one of humility, friendship and service. We should teach people to believe in God because it will soften their hearts and make them more willing to serve." - Richard Bushman

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Re: Status Update & Seeking Advice

Post by SamBee » 02 Mar 2018, 05:53

The ex-Mormon sites are one sided. There are aspects of the church which do suck, but if it was all as bad as some of these sites claim then none of us would be able to put up with it. I was actually getting depressed by reading some of them.

Better to hear both sides of the story.
DASH1730 "An Area Authority...[was] asked...who...would go to the Telestial kingdom. His answer: "murderers, adulterers and a lot of surprised Mormons!"'
1ST PRES 1978 "[LDS] believe...there is truth in many religions and philosophies...good and great religious leaders... have raised the spiritual, moral, and ethical awareness of their people. When we speak of The [LDS] as the only true is...authorized to administer the Jesus Christ... we do not mean... it is the only teacher of truth."

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