Introducing DW to some of the tough issues

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Re: Introducing DW to some of the tough issues

Post by hippo » 27 Dec 2014, 20:36

I have also been the DW in the same spot your wife is in. All I would say is first and foremost, in all you do with regards to this, let your love for her be paramount. Take the discussion at her pace. Stop when she asks to, even if it is abruptly. And, start with all information and sources that will not be taken in any way to be "anti-mormon." It was when my husband tearfully came to me with things found on or linked sites that I finally was able to stop worrying about his possible "falling away" and see the facts as they were for the first time. Granted, I'm not sure I'm glad that I know what I know now because it has been a rocky few years spiritually speaking. But our marriage has become stronger than ever as we stick together and love each other wherever we are at on this journey.

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Re: Introducing DW to some of the tough issues

Post by Heber13 » 07 Jan 2015, 10:41

I would also assume that what you talk about, she will likely discuss with others (the bishop, family members, etc) because she may want faithful apologetic support on how to address these issues. You don't want to rock her faith, and so hopefully you can find ways to discuss topics regardless of faith.
"If we have the truth, [it] cannot be harmed by investigation. If we have not the truth, it ought to be harmed." - J. Reuben Clark
There is a book called "Shaken faith syndrome" By Michael R Ash that goes through many topics but with a faithful perspective. I wasn't too impressed with the book overall, but it did fairly present some topics, and then seemed to present a faithful approach to explaining it. In other words...that is one way to look at it...but I have my own views.

That might be a source to open the discussion, and then talk with your wife about how you see it, while being safe there is a way to look at it faithfully, even if you disagree with some of Ash's thoughts. It would be a way to have the discussions, and hopefully point out that the issues are real, and shouldn't just be dismissed as "internet anti material".

Podcasts at the top of my list I liked and think I could discuss with others:
Mormon Stories Episodes 015-017: Mormon Stages of Faith with Tom Kimball and Dan Wotherspoon
Mormon Stories Episodes 47-51 with Richard Bushman
Mormon Stories Episodes 289-293: Terryl Givens — An Approach to Thoughtful, Honest and Faithful Mormonism
Mormon Stories Episodes 430-434 Hans Mattsson
Mormon Stories Episode 439 Greg Prince on Faith and Doubt as Partners in Mormon History
Mormon Stories Episodes 446-449 (Pastor, Rabbi, and Imam discussing Interfaith future of religion)
Luke: "Why didn't you tell me? You told me Vader betrayed and murdered my father."
Obi-Wan: "Your father... was seduced by the dark side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and became Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So what I told you was true... from a certain point of view."
Luke: "A certain point of view?"
Obi-Wan: "Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to...depend greatly on our point of view."

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Re: Introducing DW to some of the tough issues

Post by Ann » 08 Jan 2015, 03:28

SunbeltRed wrote:
I don't want to drop a crazy amount of information on her at once so wondering if there are certain podcasts, articles, that do a good job of presenting the complicated issues?
I don't know if this will be helpful, but I liked these Mormon Stories episodes because they weren't about the tough issues. They speak more to how to maintain ourselves as individuals in an institution, setting boundaries instead of just leaving altogether.

002 - David O. McKay and the Rise of Modern Mormonism
052 - J. Bonner Ritchie
370-371 - Philip Barlow and A Thoughtful Faith
"Preachers err by trying to talk people into belief; better they reveal the radiance of their own discovery." - Joseph Campbell

"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes." - Marcel Proust

"Therefore they said unto him, How were thine eyes opened? He answered and said unto them, A man that is called Jesus made clay, and anointed my eyes...." - John 9:10-11

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Re: Introducing DW to some of the tough issues

Post by Awakening » 07 Feb 2015, 17:44

Just finally reading this post. How is it going? I am the "wife" who was not the one starting this FC. My advice is SLOW too! Podcasts are good as well as things that really have happened coming from a prophet"s mouth! The letter written about the blacks in Cuba was big eye opener to me. I began to humanize these men. Hope all is going well with you two!

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