What if I'm wrong?

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
meggle
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What if I'm wrong?

Post by meggle » 07 Oct 2014, 09:06

I've gotta give mom3 credit for this post- like so many of the rest of you, I'm on here a lot, and it's been a huge benefit to me- and I sometimes also wish there were more posts and comments. So here I am, and here's what I have to say:
Do any of the rest of you worry that you've got it wrong? As I find myself transitioning away from my former "all or nothing" approach, I sometimes worry. Lately I view ordinances as largely symbolic, but have a hard time seeing them as necessary to salvation for all people. I've been baptized, endowed, and sealed to my husband, so I guess I've covered them all- but I'm not sure they are strictly necessary. Or maybe what I'm not sure about is how necessary it is to live all of our "rules" with exactness. And honestly, I don't pray much lately, so maybe I'm being led astray...what say ye, wise ones?

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nibbler
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by nibbler » 07 Oct 2014, 09:19

First: I'm not a wise one. ;)
Second: My answer isn't going to help you at all.

Now that that's out of the way...
meggle wrote:Do any of the rest of you worry that you've got it wrong?
No, I don't worry I've got it wrong. That's because I'm pretty sure I've got it wrong so there's no need to fret over it. Heck, if I've got it wrong that means I'm wrong about being wrong, so I'm right in thinking I've got it all wrong. :crazy:

But in all seriousness, as strange as it sounds I find a great deal of comfort in knowing that I don't have all the answers. Uncertainty would have scared me in the past but now that same uncertainty drives my faith.

The best I can tell you is to take ownership of your own unique spiritual path. For me one of the hardest doubts to overcome has been self doubt.
None of the things one frets about ever happen. Something one's never thought of does.
― Connie Willis , Doomsday Book

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nibbler
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by nibbler » 07 Oct 2014, 09:26

Oh, another answer.

What if I'm wrong?
No worries, everyone else is too.
None of the things one frets about ever happen. Something one's never thought of does.
― Connie Willis , Doomsday Book

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SilentDawning
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by SilentDawning » 07 Oct 2014, 19:50

meggle wrote: So here I am, and here's what I have to say:
Do any of the rest of you worry that you've got it wrong?
The mark of a free person is that ever-persistent uncertainty about whether you are right.

So, yes, I wonder if I have it wrong. If the things I'm doing now will consign me to endless woe and lack of eternal progression.

But guess what -- I also wondered if I had it right when I was a Tr-holder and living all or nothing too!!!
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

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Haven
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by Haven » 07 Oct 2014, 20:06

Yep. I worry about it all the time. I wonder if I'm blind to truth now that I've gone awhile without attending church. I pray every day for guidance and to know if I should stay with the church. But I haven't received an answer that I recognize. I worry about the next life a lot. I don't want to end up where God isn't. What I realized is that even though I try to serve others and be an honest, giving person this won't matter in the next life if I'm not attending the temple, going to church and if I don't believe in the prophet. So, yes I'm concerned and I don't know what to do about it. Guess that probably wasn't very helpful. :think:
However, I have a hope that someday I will feel at peace about my spiritual journey and that I will be stronger and more faithful to God because of it. :P

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West
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by West » 07 Oct 2014, 20:15

My answer is also not going to help much, too. :)

Directly after my FC, I definitely wondered if I was wrong about a lot of things. It brought me to tears almost every day for a couple weeks, and more than once the tears were frightened, desperate sobbing. Switching from the all-or-nothing belief is really, really difficult, because it's such a black and white world in the church. You're either right or you're wrong. The fear that I'd gotten "it" wrong somehow was really paralyzing for a little while there. Fortunately, I tend to adapt fairly quickly after traumatic experiences, and now I'm like nibbler -- I'm comfortable knowing that I don't know all the answers, and heck, no one really knows all the answers anyway.

There are a lot of instances in life where we just have to take what little information and experience we have on a subject and continue on our way with the hope that the conclusions we reach are the right ones. Some people can make and stick to their conclusion come hell or higher waters, while others are comfortable letting things change and evolve over time.

I still wonder sometimes if I've got it wrong and if I'll die and reach the afterlife and look around and go, hmm, you know, I was completely off on this. But it's more a curiosity now rather than a fear. The beliefs I've redefined for myself post-FC have really helped me a lot in getting to this state of mind.
Lately I view ordinances as largely symbolic, but have a hard time seeing them as necessary to salvation for all people. I've been baptized, endowed, and sealed to my husband, so I guess I've covered them all- but I'm not sure they are strictly necessary. Or maybe what I'm not sure about is how necessary it is to live all of our "rules" with exactness.
This is an instance where the conclusion is different for all of us. From what I've seen, there are quite a few here who don't believe our "rules" are strictly necessary. I personally know many who live by the spirit of the law than by the exact word, and they find comfort in that. For me, it's more a cultural, tradition-based thing, and coming from an ethnic culture based a lot on traditions, I don't mind living pretty closely to the "rules" when they don't clash with my beliefs or my logic.

This isn't going to help, but it's really up to you to decide what you believe on this and what you believe is the nature of God. My belief in the nature of God tells me that with so many possibilities and options and paths built into our existence, it's improbable to expect anyone to be exactly right, and in fact it's against nature and logic to do so.

And at the very least, you can take comfort in knowing that if you're wrong, a whole lot of other people are right there with you. :)
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. -Albert Einstein

And God said 'Love Your Enemy,' and I obeyed him and loved myself. -Kahlil Gibran

Curt Sunshine
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by Curt Sunshine » 07 Oct 2014, 21:57

Since I believe there is no way for me to know with absolute certainty what ultimately is right and what ultimately is wrong, all I have is following the dictates of my own conscience with faith (hope in the unseen) that I won't be punished for doing so.

Thus, no, I don't worry about it. Of course, it helps that I'm not a worrier by nature. :smile:
I see through my glass, darkly - as I play my saxophone in harmony with the other instruments in God's orchestra. (h/t Elder Joseph Wirthlin)

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

"For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

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DarkJedi
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by DarkJedi » 08 Oct 2014, 02:43

I don't worry much, either, and I don't worry about this. If Heavenly Father really does know each of us and if He really is as loving and merciful as the scriptures seem to indicate, He knows my heart. If I am to be punished for following the dictates of my own conscience in doing what I believe is right, so be it.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

My Introduction

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Cadence
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by Cadence » 08 Oct 2014, 05:19

I may be wrong about many things, but I am a sure as I can be the church is not what it claims to be. I am sure as humanly possible that the god of Mormonism does not exist. Well at least the way some of my high priest think of him.

When you have so much evidence and rational though that tells you the world is different than you were taught, it makes no sense to have to believe contrary. Not sure why anyone would want to believe in a god like that.
Faith, as well intentioned as it may be, must be built on facts, not fiction--faith in fiction is a damnable false hope. Thomas A. Edison

“The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it.” Neil deGrasse Tyson

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SunbeltRed
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Re: What if I'm wrong?

Post by SunbeltRed » 08 Oct 2014, 06:07

DarkJedi wrote:I don't worry much, either, and I don't worry about this. If Heavenly Father really does know each of us and if He really is as loving and merciful as the scriptures seem to indicate, He knows my heart. If I am to be punished for following the dictates of my own conscience in doing what I believe is right, so be it.

I line up a lot with DJ on this. I worry about it a lot less now than I did before (and actually I don't worry about it much now). IMHO, if God is the type of God who will damn me for eternity for doing my best, and there really are different levels (kingdoms) in the afterlife, I'm not much interested in living with that God (that probably sounds a bit blasphemous, but is a comfortable conclusion I personally have come to). I will assume that my wife and kids would rather that we hang out together in the Terrestial kingdom than be separated. Also, come find DJ and I because we will be hanging out together (DJ and meggle no offense intended that we will not be in the Celestial Kingdom. Also open invitiation to all other potential Terestrial kingdom dwellers to come hang out as well :)...If you can't tell I don't take it as seriously as I used to).

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