Mormon and Same Sex Attracted

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
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Re: Mormon and Same Sex Attracted

Post by nightwalden » 13 Jul 2010, 20:24

It seems like your bishop thinks that as far as the belief part of the temple recommend goes, you pass with him. It also seems like he wants you to make some changes in conduct to be temple worthy because he believes it will help you to be happy. I would try to refrain from reading any more into it. I guess knowing what your bishop believes about your potential temple recommend status forces you to decide if this is something that you want. But it is completely up to you. And if you want to understand more clearly what your bishop is saying to help you choose what you want then ask him. Good luck.

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Re: Mormon and Same Sex Attracted

Post by SamBee » 14 Jul 2010, 03:46

Three of his brothers never married. Were they gay? I was never told. It was a different time.
To be fair, this doesn't mean that they were gay at all. Once you go past a certain point in life, it's harder to get married anyway. Some people just never find a decent life partner. Some like women, and are even womanizers but never marry (one of my parents' friends fell into this category)

By LDS standards I'm old to be a bachelor. I certainly like women, but have never found a woman I liked enough to marry... and i don't know how many women would put up with me.
DASH1730 "An Area Authority...[was] asked...who...would go to the Telestial kingdom. His answer: "murderers, adulterers and a lot of surprised Mormons!"'
1ST PRES 1978 "[LDS] believe...there is truth in many religions and philosophies...good and great religious leaders... have raised the spiritual, moral, and ethical awareness of their people. When we speak of The [LDS] as the only true is...authorized to administer the Jesus Christ... we do not mean... it is the only teacher of truth."

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Re: Mormon and Same Sex Attracted

Post by bridget_night » 14 Jul 2010, 17:44

Go to this link on the latest progress of Mormon and Gays meeting in California with support of Berkley Stake Pres. ... .html#more

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Re: Mormon and Same Sex Attracted

Post by George » 06 Sep 2010, 20:30

If this topic interests you, please consider listening to the five interviews currently up at Mormon Stories Podcast. They are between John Dehlin and our LDS poet, Carol Lynn Pearson. Talk about a worthwhile four and half hours of listening...... maybe crying a little bit as well.

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Re: Mormon and Same Sex Attracted

Post by ecuador95 » 19 Dec 2011, 14:04


I'm sorry to hear that you have gone through so much pain over this. It is not fun. What I want to say to you is that I believe your situation is not that different for many people, if not all humans, in this life. Yours is over same sex relationships. But others (including my own) are over different things. It's confusion is what it is. I feel confused all the time as to the purpose of life, what is right and wrong. I think it is that confusion that drives these people we free-thinkers call "delusional" to cling to a religion and embrace it as all or nothing. Which is why we shouldn't criticize them, because they are just as lost in life as we are and looking for answers to life's tough questions. Every day of my life I must wake up and move forward not knowing the exact purpose of life or the answer to life's deep questions. Life is a mystery. Even the prophets of old spoke of God as being mysterious. He's a mystery because we are ignorant and don't understand him. I believe you are just experiencing what we all experience as confusion over life. Unfortunately, there is no human on this planet that can tell you why you feel the sexual attraction to men. Not the prophet, not your bishop, not your parents. No one can tell you how you should behave, its up to you. But you are not alone in this struggle. All humans who think and rationalize and observe are just as confused as you are. I am baffled by the gospel and its doctrines. And I know that I will always be. So here are some keys that I've found out to dealing with this confusion.

1. Quit obsessing over it. Imagine obsessing over why you can't over come the power of gravity. Question, yes, but obsession is unhealthy. How you should behave sexually is a question you will never have fully answered in this life. So quit worrying so much.

2. Find what brings you joy in life (that which is healthy) and stick with it. I love music. I love sports. I love passing those skills on to my kids. These are healthy distractions from the pain and toil of life.

3. Adhere to those things in the gospel that you KNOW are true. Whether or not there is a God, I know I need to take care of my loved ones and serve them. If the Mormon church is all wrong or all right that fact is set in stone and I will not deviate from it. Helping poor people and less fortunate IS right. Do it. Just because we are all lost doesn't mean we don't know anything.

I know you want some one to be right when they say flat out if you should act out and be gay or not. It will NEVER happen. I'm sorry to say that to you, but this is the reality of life. And not just for you. I have been told the family is the central unit in the eternities. I battle every day to keep my marriage together because sometimes to me it seems not worth the pain. This is my problem to which I have no answer, and I never will. Should I keep my marriage together or not? There are all kinds of people around me who think they know, and think they have answers but they do not. Only I can make that decision for myself. Best of luck to you. I hope you read this and take to heart some of the things I have learned to cope with my confusion over life.

God Bless.

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