New bishopric member seeks advice

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
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HiJolly
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Joined: 11 Feb 2009, 21:25

Re: New bishopric member seeks advice

Post by HiJolly » 03 May 2010, 19:05

Cadence wrote: By biggest question is always "How do you know" You see I desperately want to know but all your methods of prayer and study never work for me. If you can give me some definitive experience beyond anecdotal or coincidental occurrences then I am interested. If not then I am afraid I must conclude your belief is fabricated.
Have you seen this: http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_tay ... sight.html

Mystics consciously shut down the left hemisphere of the brain, and then they 'know'. Since the opposite is being systematically done in today's universities and intellectual pursuits, I don't see how learning to use BOTH sides is a problem. A truly well balanced human will use both sides of the brain.


HiJolly
Men are not moved by events but by their interpretations.
-- The Stoic Epictetus

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Konvert Kid
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Joined: 17 Nov 2009, 11:04
Location: North Texas

Re: New bishopric member seeks advice

Post by Konvert Kid » 03 May 2010, 20:17

I haven't read all the comments closely; someone may have covered this. Consider having your first meeting at Tasty Cream, Artic Circle or some neutral location Many members feel they are being inspected when the Bish. ask for an appointment to visit you at home.

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SamBee
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Joined: 14 Mar 2010, 04:55

Re: New bishopric member seeks advice

Post by SamBee » 04 May 2010, 04:53

Konvert Kid wrote:I haven't read all the comments closely; someone may have covered this. Consider having your first meeting at Tasty Cream, Artic Circle or some neutral location Many members feel they are being inspected when the Bish. ask for an appointment to visit you at home.
I'd agree with this, but with one caveat... Make sure if you go to a public location that it is a) not busy, and b) quiet.
DASH1730 "An Area Authority...[was] asked...who...would go to the Telestial kingdom. His answer: "murderers, adulterers and a lot of surprised Mormons!"'
1ST PRES 1978 "[LDS] believe...there is truth in many religions and philosophies...good and great religious leaders... have raised the spiritual, moral, and ethical awareness of their people. When we speak of The [LDS] as the only true church...it is...authorized to administer the ordinances...by Jesus Christ... we do not mean... it is the only teacher of truth."

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Heber13
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Location: In the Middle

Re: New bishopric member seeks advice

Post by Heber13 » 04 May 2010, 08:51

HiJolly wrote:A truly well balanced human will use both sides of the brain.
Well said, HiJolly. Amen.
Luke: "Why didn't you tell me? You told me Vader betrayed and murdered my father."
Obi-Wan: "Your father... was seduced by the dark side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and became Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So what I told you was true... from a certain point of view."
Luke: "A certain point of view?"
Obi-Wan: "Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to...depend greatly on our point of view."

Featherina

Re: New bishopric member seeks advice

Post by Featherina » 04 May 2010, 10:43

NWwisdomseeker wrote:But in general, I believe that communal effort often surpasses the capability of individuals to accomplish good things...

I don't believe we should gate participation in the programs by a test of "right thinking" or even necessarily "right living". Actions are important, and I believe there are some actions that should probably disqualify someone from participation in any society, but they are rare, especially in a religious society which is built on a promise of "come unto me ... and I will give ye rest." ...

I don't believe my objective is to get you to "know". It is to understand, encourage, find out how to improve the community, and to deliver a message of welcome and respect. It is up to you to figure out what you know and believe, and ultimately what you intend to do with that belief.
So many good thoughts given. I'd highlight what you wrote here & add: you'll be more successful in including these "drifters" in the ward, if you involve the ward. Maybe have a few lessons about what you mentioned above, especially Christ's (the church's/ward's?) theme: "come unto me & I will give ye rest." Not condemning judgment, but openness & a sense of belonging to a group where one can rest from worries & cares ("bear one another's burdens")... I've found when I feel accepted & appreciated for who I am, then I WANT to give back, to serve. It is so nice to belong! But it's also hard at times, because people can hurt & it's especially painful when I'm not accepting & appreciating myself. I guess it's a 2 way street - members being open & "drifters" being self-secure enough to try to fit in.

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SilentDawning
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Joined: 09 May 2010, 19:55

Re: New bishopric member seeks advice

Post by SilentDawning » 09 May 2010, 23:54

I too get labelled an intellectual, So, I think I'm a good one to ask your question -- what would I want?

First, I'd want you to meet with me privately or with my wife also present if she too was intellectual, had concerns, and was willing. No meeting at the Church or public discussion in an existing class. The rule that you only provide faith-promoting dialogue at Church is too strong to allow for discussion of doubts or counterpoint, and would stunt conversation. I wouldn't have any compunction about you asking to come over to see me in my own home, or inviting me over to your place.

Second, I'd like the conversation to allow me to discuss my concerns and positions on issues.

Third, I'd like to avoid all of the trite sayings and standard answers to hard questions that are void of critical thinking. I'd rather there was mutual exploration of the issue. I'd like to come away from the discussion with my mind expanded on issues and seeing more sides of the issue than I did before meeting with you.

Fourth, and this is a tough one, I'd like there to be some spirituality in the meeting. A prayer would be OK at some point in the meeting. Expressions of love and kindness would also be welcome. A discussion about people who were gay or feminist, and also happy in the Church, as well as their personal perspectives would be welcome, provided those perspectives avoided trite and shop-worn phrases that people use to placate issues that have difficult solutions.

Fifth -- it would be OK if there were no conclusions drawn as a result of our meeting. And I'd hope you'd be satisfied if the meeting ended and I felt no differently about the issues than before you came. For me, the dawning of a new understanding would probably happen much later, after I had time to reflect on the issues and perspectives we shared.

The overarching benefit of your visit -- relief from the brakes I feel the Church puts on our intellect and questioning in the name of obedience. Acceptance of questioning, affirmation of my acceptability in the Church as someone who questions policy, and stimulating conversation. A healthy dose of spiritual feelings during the meeting would also help.

Don't ask for much, do I?
"It doesn't have to be about the Church (church) all the time!" -- SD

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

A man asked Jesus "do all roads lead to you?" Jesus responds,”most roads don’t lead anywhere, but I will travel any road to find you.” Adapted from The Shack, William Young

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