How I came back

Public forum for those seeking support for their experience in the LDS Church.
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DarkJedi
Posts: 6657
Joined: 24 Aug 2013, 20:53

Re: How I came back

Post by DarkJedi » 19 Jun 2019, 15:18

I'm still very curious about what the catalyst for your return was. I want to try to understand.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

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REBEL2
Posts: 20
Joined: 19 Jan 2019, 08:57

Re: How I came back

Post by REBEL2 » 09 Jul 2019, 04:32

I came back because of family mostly my wife. I love her more than the church irritates me. I really enjoyed reading planted by patrick Mason that book helped me realize the church belongs to all of us and no one should feel pushed out as I did.The church is basically good despite its many flaws. I have my main points I believe and my points of the church I just live with but dont agree with polygamy comes to mind, there are more. I am back for good because I dont see a better example of Christianity. God Bless all.

Minyan Man
Posts: 1700
Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 13:40

Re: How I came back

Post by Minyan Man » 09 Jul 2019, 05:02

REBEL2 wrote:
09 Jul 2019, 04:32
I came back because of family mostly my wife. I love her more than the church irritates me. I really enjoyed reading planted by patrick Mason that book helped me realize the church belongs to all of us and no one should feel pushed out as I did.The church is basically good despite its many flaws. I have my main points I believe and my points of the church I just live with but dont agree with polygamy comes to mind, there are more. I am back for good because I dont see a better example of Christianity. God Bless all.
Excellent. I agree with you 100%. Since I became "active" again, I have tried to live by the principle: keep what you can use & leave the rest.
This applies to doctrine, teachings, history, testimonies, etc. That doesn't mean I can't change. And God Bless you too.

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LookingHard
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Joined: 20 Oct 2014, 12:11

Re: How I came back

Post by LookingHard » 09 Jul 2019, 09:24

I am happy you have found a way to make it work. I am glad to see someone that can.

From what has been describe I have to say, "I don't get it". I assume it is just difference in people, their history, their circumstances, their ward and leadership, etc. But what I hearing you saying just doesn't really compute for me right now.

I would be considered fully active, but skipping things like Sunday 7AM stake priesthood meeting. I am active because my wife is TBM and I feel it show my love for her to support her even though she knows I don't believe.

I do think part of me REALLY wants to just be away from any activity, but I am not where I am going to do that. Maybe I would need some "time away" to be able to even have the desire let alone the ability to be in and comfortable doing it.

I have made huge strides being able to feel OK with others (i.e. TBM's) and not being upset. But that is totally different than actually wanting to be in church each Sunday.

I may at this point be a a different place of "stay LDS" than others. I am more in a place of, "learn to tolerate being LDS'ish".

I am happy for you and wish you well, even if I am left scratching my head.

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Rumin8
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Joined: 25 Mar 2018, 14:00

Re: How I came back

Post by Rumin8 » 11 Jul 2019, 16:35

This is fascinating. I'm in a very similar place as LookingHard (if not a bit more "out") and I also don't understand what changed for Rebel2, but I respect the heck out of anyone who can make this work at any level. Whether that means all in, mostly out, or anything in between. So to you, Rebel2, may I express my heartfelt congratulations? What a journey this has been for you.

I too believe it is not a binary choice. I cling to that, so that I can myself keep a hold of my heritage, culture, friends, and family relationships.
"Moderation in all things, especially moderation." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Be excellent to each other." - Abraham Lincoln to Bill & Ted

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LookingHard
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Joined: 20 Oct 2014, 12:11

Re: How I came back

Post by LookingHard » 12 Jul 2019, 08:30

I might almost venture to say "he didn't REALLY go down the rabbit hole as much as I have" (I get it - that is judging to say that). But resigning is usually a sign that someone is taking things seriously and it isn't just that "the bishop ticked me off one Sunday".

But I want to be clear. I am trying not to judge and I am very happy for rebel making this work. But just as Rumin8, I don't understand it. I have become more accepting of not understanding (knowing) and accepting others truth for themselves. Especially if they are not saying, "You have to think/believe/act just like I do." I see none of that from rebel.

REBEL2
Posts: 20
Joined: 19 Jan 2019, 08:57

Re: How I came back

Post by REBEL2 » 13 Jul 2019, 14:13

I wanted to post again because I feel like I'm not being clear about y position . I did come back basically for family i.e. my wife however I feel that my inward beliefs toward religion are as follows I believe in basic Christianity i.e. the 10 commandments, Christ is the son of God , be a good person help others. I dont believe I need the church to make it to the CK or to be saved. I think their is truth in most churches and God speaks to us in ways we will hear him/accept him that's why we have so many Christian churches. In fact I align closer to the beliefs of the Coc . I have come back and stay because my wife and sister in law are TBMs and the church does have many many good people in it. All churches have issues !!!!! The LDS church is still a good place to be even if I keep my beliefs to myself and only agree with some teachings like the pre existence. I do have issues seeing others being treated poorly because of race, sexual orientation, ethnicity etc, etc. Just wanted th throw all that out there I would love to hear others thoughts on this , I guess I have my own hybrid belief system.

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DarkJedi
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Joined: 24 Aug 2013, 20:53

Re: How I came back

Post by DarkJedi » 14 Jul 2019, 05:41

REBEL2 wrote:
13 Jul 2019, 14:13
I guess I have my own hybrid belief system.
I think we all do. The more orthodox types tend to criticize what they might call "cafeteria Mormonism" but in reality we all pick and choose what we do or don't believe or do or don't fully believe. Some of us just happen to believe much less than others. I think and hope there is room for us in the church because the gospel of Jesus Christ, which the church professes, is for everybody.
In the absence of knowledge or faith there is always hope.

Once there was a gentile...who came before Hillel. He said "Convert me on the condition that you teach me the whole Torah while I stand on one foot." Hillel converted him, saying: That which is despicable to you, do not do to your fellow, this is the whole Torah, and the rest is commentary, go and learn it."

My Introduction

Roy
Posts: 5695
Joined: 07 Oct 2010, 14:16
Location: Pacific Northwest

Re: How I came back

Post by Roy » 14 Jul 2019, 12:09

I might almost venture to say "he didn't REALLY go down the rabbit hole as much as I have" (I get it - that is judging to say that).
I get that perception. In the early stages of my faith crisis/transition I felt like I was falling off a cliff and grasping at straws to stop or slow the descent. I landed on a firm platform that "God loves me". In talking to my Bishop at the time he expressed that he too had had something of a faith crisis and had landed on a shelf that was essentially, "LDS church holds the restored priesthood of God". Church leaders could say and do a lot of kooky things but in the end it was the authority of priesthood that mattered. I marveled that he would find firm footing so much higher up on the cliff face, while I had fallen so much further. I now believe that the human mind on a subconscious level does not like the discomfort of a shelf or assumptive world collapse and will seek to right itself. I do not believe that I choose my shelf of "God Loves me". It came from a place deep inside that I took to be revelation and I clung to it for dear life.
REBEL2 wrote:
13 Jul 2019, 14:13
I guess I have my own hybrid belief system.
Yes, so do I. I keep as much of Mormonism as makes sense to me. I do not really believe that what I keep is necessarily more true than what I discard. In this sense, principles or doctrines can be personally "true" or not based on their usefulness. A hammer can be great for hammering nails but if it is a saw you need a hammer will not be "true" or useful for the job. While someone else may think hammers are the best things since sliced bread and have gone their entire lives hungering for a proper hammer. This coping mechanism helps me (somewhat) to allow others to find inspiration, belief, and joy where they may without getting too hung up on the "truth" of the belief. If it helps them to live a more fulfilling life then it is true to them.
"It is not so much the pain and suffering of life which crushes the individual as it is its meaninglessness and hopelessness." C. A. Elwood

“It is not the function of religion to answer all the questions about God’s moral government of the universe, but to give one courage, through faith, to go on in the face of questions he never finds the answer to in his present status.” TPC: Harold B. Lee 223

"I struggle now with establishing my faith that God may always be there, but may not always need to intervene" Heber13

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